The tragic wedding in a barn
One hot summer afternoon, I was sitting at home when someone knocked on the courtyard door. “It’s me, Safa’s mother,” my sister announced. Smiling, I welcomed her inside and asked, “Why did you trouble yourself to come all the way here in this heat?” She had brought clothes for herself and Safa and wanted me to sew them.
We chatted for a while but she seemed restless, constantly glancing at the wall clock. “Safa is home alone. I must go back,” she said. I insisted she stay as it was scorching outside but she refused. “Just sew these clothes for me, and I’ll come back later so we can sit together,” she said before rushing out.
Not long after, I heard loud cries, curses, and the sounds of people being beaten. I wondered what had happened in the village — perhaps someone had died, or maybe a husband was beating his wife again. Moments later, the roar of Taliban Ranger vehicles echoed through the streets. I hurried outside and saw Taliban fighters standing in front of my sister’s house, mercilessly beating Qais, the boy from our neighbourhood. They shoved him into the Ranger vehicle.
“I am ruined! My honor is gone! May God take my life! I wish I had never been given a daughter!” wailed my sister as she beat her face in despair. I ran toward her. Her face was bruised. Safa lay on the ground, sobbing. One of her uncles yelled, “Today is your death day! You won’t survive this!” The other uncles joined in, shouting threats before storming toward my sister and Safa. They began kicking them in the stomach so violently that I feared they would die right there.
I screamed, “What crime have they committed to deserve such cruelty?” Safa’s eldest uncle shouted back, “These shameless girls have stained our family’s honour! They must be eliminated!”
News spread quickly that 19-year-old Qais and 17-year-old Safa had been found together and alone in a house. When my sister had returned home, Qais had panicked and jumped from their wall, breaking his arm. One of Safa’s uncles saw him trying to escape and chased him down.
When the uncle learned that Qais had been inside the house with Safa, he raised an alarm, thereby informing the entire village. The family informed the Taliban, who immediately arrested Qais. The Taliban tortured him while in custody, including repeatedly hanging him in a well to force a confession. After searching his phone and finding photos of Safa, the Taliban beat Qais until he admitted being in a romantic relationship with Safa for three years.
Safa was also interrogated and admitted that they had spoken on the phone and met occasionally. After extracting those confessions, the Taliban ruled that the two must marry. They also ordered Qais’s father to pay 800,000 afghani (approximately $9,000) as a bride price and reparation.
Qais’s father, a poor farmer, had to sell his land to save his son’s life. He paid the demanded amount.
A forced marriage
After the Taliban’s ruling, Safa’s uncles refused to hold the wedding ceremony at the family’s home, declaring that the couple had disgraced the family. Instead, they chose the barn, saying it was the only place fit for the couple. A plastic mat was spread on the stable floor, on which Safa and Qais sat as their marriage was solemnized.
There was no joy, no bridal dress, and no festive atmosphere. Qais wore ordinary clothes while Safa still bore bruises on her face. No one smiled; no one celebrated. It was not a wedding but a mourning ceremony.
From the barn, they were sent directly to the groom’s house. Their humiliating marriage took place last summer, but their suffering did not end. Instead, it only worsened. Safa was tortured daily, called shameless and sick by those around her. Qais’s mother constantly complained about Safa, and his father and elder brother frequently beat her. She could not leave the house, as the community scorned her for bringing dishonour to her family. Unable or unwilling to stand up for her, Qais remained silent.
Safa’s mental health deteriorated. She became ill, lost her emotional stability, and now, can barely speak. She could no longer perform household chores, and her in-laws declared her a burden. Eventually, they threw her and Qais out of the house. The couple was forced to return to Safa’s father’s home.
After having to sell his land, Safa’s father is a daily wage labourer and too poor to afford medical treatments for his daughter. Four months ago, Qais left for Iran in search of work. Since then, Safa and her family have received no calls or messages from him. It is unclear if Safa understands what had happened with her husband – she has lost touch with reality, unable to distinguish day from night.
Safa’s maternal aunt told this story to a Zan Times journalist.
